It's that time again…no Billy, not for your daily enema, it's time for The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show.  We may not hurt as bad, but we promise by the time your done, your ass will bleed just as much.  In the epic pop culture world, Mike and Chris both discuss their views on the new Transformers and Harry Potter movies.  Amongst the rambling and possibly good/bad Ron Weasley impressions, Mike tossed out the contest.  Send us an email and the best two for good and bad will receive an official pen.  Next, in the news, Will It Blend strikes again and this time its at the core of Apple…..get it?  Core?  Apple?  Anyways, it seems yes, an iPhone will indeed blend.  More HP news with the release of the tragic next chapter, Harry Potter and The Melting Animal Flesh Pink Dancing Elephant God My Body is Cold No WAIT I'm Really Hot, also known as ecstasy.  Thieves and counterfeit money, but stealing from little children is, well, hilarious as this story shows with Lemonade scent.  FYI to the sexual predators out there, cut off your feet so you are smaller and then you won't go to jail because of the precedent set by this judge.  ROCK PAPER SCISSORS…..WORST IDEA EVER ON ESPN?  You watch and decide.  Left it to starving dying African children to use their laptops to search for porn.  More Nintendo Wii news concerning it's record breaking existence as it brings another start title, Mario Kart, to it's resume.  And Sony still sucks.  Transformers are indeed more than meets the eye, but don't record them at all, not even for 20 seconds cause you will go to jail, unless you are a cute Asian chick.  Watch for the sequels already in progress.  Welcome back to Kevin Spacey for the next Superman movie.  Finally, we have WTF is Wrong With Japanese People and here for This Week in Hiro.  Masi Oka was nominated for an Emmy!  Good for him!  We all hope he wins.  Lastly, for this next story, go watch the Matrix and then read it…..robots….we keep telling you….but you don't listen…..

iPhone Will it Blend? 

"Harry Potter" Ecstasy Pills

Who Would Rob a Kid's Lemonade Stand?

5 Foot 1 Sexual Predator does not get jail time…

 
Sports 

ESPN televises Rock Paper Scissors

Tech

Kids use donated laptops to surf porn

Gaming

Mario Kart Wii In 2007

Wii sales hit 9 million worldwide - just one million behind Xbox360

Xbox Division Posts $1.9 Billion Operating Loss for Fiscal 2007

Movies

Decepticons ruin womans life. Autobots have no Comment.

Two 'Transformers' sequels in pipeline

Kevin Spacey will return as Lex Luthor in “Superman: Man of Steel”

This Week In Hiro

Hiro Nakamura Nominated for an Emmy

What the fuck is wrong with, Asians?

2008 Olympics in the Sun: Rockets to Disperse Rain Clouds

 

 Episode 45: We lead a weekend men's group. We specialize in ritual Penguin killings. [58:27m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5986)

Welcome one and all to The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show on this special occasion.  We have reached yet another July 4th and you know what that means….Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Competition.  Never in the event's history has this contest been so anticipated.  In a stunning competition at Coney Island, the title of the Mustard Belt was brought home to the USA after a 6 year reign of the champ Takeru Kobayashi. News stories reported Kobayashi had his wisdom teeth taken out as well as suffered from jaw injury, but the champ showed no sign of that as he took on the number 2 ranked eater in the world, Joey Chestnut. Last month at a qualifier, Chestnut set a new world record shattering the previous held by Kobayashi. He was able to eat 59 1/2 HDBs - Hot Dogs and Buns - in 12 minutes. It was that of gladiators. The two stood side by side for the ultimate hot dog showdown. Chestnut took an early lead, but the gap was soon closed by Kobayashi. Neck and neck down the stretch until the final moments when Chestnut was able to muster the courage to down the remaining dogs. The champ? Well, he had an unfortunate "Reversal of Fortune" and lost a dog or two which only sealed the victory for Chestnut. The final total was 66 HDBs in 12 minutes! Not to be scoffed at was Kobayashi's personal best record of 63. What does this mean for the world of competitive eating? It means a new force to be reckoned with has finally taken the helm. Kobayashi will be back as any great champion does when they fall. Ultimately it's not about the record, but winning the competition.  In an effort to try and see his own potential, Mike put on his own mini contest.  The challenge was to eat 8 in 10 minutes.  It wasn't that simple as you will see for yourselves.  But this will not stop Mike and his ultimate goal of actually joining the competition next year.  In other penguin news, if you aren't hungry for HDBs, the perhaps McDs.  Watch this Iron Chef clip and decide for yourself if it was an accident or subliminal ad.  Remember the last you thing you want in your town is illegal sex in bathrooms.  Next time you get your mail, make sure all your Netflix and Blockbuster movies are there and if not than notify the post office like this guy did.  And you thought penguins were scary, beware of those killer vampire peacocks.  In a world where everything is for sale, such is the cost of schooling.  Well this British chick found a way to get both of what she needed, money and lose her virginity for a price…..Hackers R Us, people are really running out of business names we guess.  In the gaming world, predators can exist just as in the um….digital world?  An Australian woman nearly got herself a very epic drop…a 17 year old boy.  Brain game pulled for it's offensive spastic word….sorry to retards everywhere.  In news that really doesn't surprise anyone, Wii still outselling the PS3 6-1 in Japan.  Finally in this week's WTF is Wrong With Japanese People, more game shows as always.  This time we see what would happen would happen if people tried to play Tetris.  Watch Mike's video and let us know what you think!  Grats to Joey Chestnut on his win and we look forward to the next series of competitions.

Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest 2007 Part 1 Part 2

"Inside Edition" Subliminal McDonalds Ad Busted

Fort Lauderdale mayor says $250K robotic toilet may put stop to 'illegal sex'

Postal Worker Steals Thousands Of DVDs from Netflix

Man Beats Peacock to Death Because He Thought it was a Vampire

Virginity For Sale - Offers start at £10,000

Cops Who Started 'Hackers Are Us' Service Convicted

Gaming 

World of Warcraft Pedophile  

Brain game pulled over 'offense'

And What is the 'offense'?

Wii demand still outpaces supply

Wii outsells PS3 in Japan 6 to 1

Japanese 

Tetris  

Hot Dog Drama: Japanese Champ Will Compete with Injury to Honor His Mother

Hot-dog eating champs go eye to eye

 

 Joey Chestnut Beats HDB Record: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (258)

 

 Episode 44: The Champ Has Fallen…. [54:59m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5879)

 

 Mike's Hot Dog Eating Challenge [254:30m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (242)

The gods shined down and behold, The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show was there. This week we get into a very heated debated regarding the very nature of what we do here. The censorship of the radio and TV needs to stop. Both Chris and Mike have some interesting views on the subject, with some very controversial things said. We hope you enjoy. In regular news, the new Transformers trailier is here and the final countdown begins to the movie. Mean while, Spiderman 3 continutes to rake it in and already that are in process of the fourth one. Porn.com makes it's 9 million dollar jump into the news. If only we could stop putting our children into the microwave. In Canada, a giant pillow fight is held, eh. Remember V-Tech? Well some teachers though it would be a good idea to fake it to teach kids a lesson….dumbasses. If only McD's would stop haunting us….teenage + plus * happy meal = news. Fat? Play Wii and lose weight. And lastly, Geas of War Golf? Sure makes sense right? This Week in Hiro brings us sad news with the final Heroes episode of season 1. Fear not, the Heroes Origins mini series should hold us over until we get to see more feudal Hiro. WTF is Wrong With Japanese People went backwards this week, but the stories are not….wow that made no sense. Have you seen Ninja Warrior - Sasuke on G4 yet? Watch it! Feel the power of the ninja! Shout out to Makoto Nagano as our picked best competitor. The next two stories kinda play together i.e. Japanese breastfeeding and Japanese women getting more curves thanks to ice cream and other such western cuisine. Japanese children like to severe their parents heads, too. Weird video of another game show with a Japanese Bruce Willis. Finally, a story we told you about a while ago with an update. The baby drop slots in Japan had it's first delivery; a three year old boy that his father didn't want. Sorry microwave dad, at least this guy did it legally.

Movies

Transformers Movie Update: Final Theater Trailer Hits The Web

Spider-Man 3 Earns $622 Million In First 10 Days

Spiderman 4 being planned before Spiderman 3 corpse is cold

Stupid Shit

Porn.com Domain Sold for $9 Million!

Mom blames Satan for burning baby in microwave

Air fills with feathers at Toronto City Hall during massive pillow fight

Teachers stage fake gunman attack on sixth-graders

McDonald's Employee Hides Pot Stash In Happy Meal Box, Gives to Child

Gaming

Guy Lost 28 lbs on Slimfast, Pizza, and Wii!

Gears Of War Golf (confirmed)

This Week In Hiro

'Heroes': A Spin-off Series!

Japanese

Ninja Warrior - Sasuke

Sasuke - Wikipedia Style

Makoto Nagano Championship Run

Asian Pacific American Heritage Month

Japan Breastfeeding

Japanese women bust out

Japan boy 'severs mother's head'

Japanese Bruce Willis clone

Japan - Dad Dumps PRESCHOOLER (not baby) in Drop Box For Unwanted Newborns

 

 Episode 42:: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5724)

The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show was recorded before a live studio audience. What’s the point of caring when all it brings is sorrow and pain….conformist…..or says Peter Parker in Spiderman 3. Welcome to The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show and our official Transcontinental Penguin Super Review of the new box office record breaking movie. Both Mike and Chris agree that the movie disappointed in ways we didn’t think were possible. With that said, it wasn’t a bad movie, but our opinions stand that there was too much flamingness to parts of the story and much stupidity to the emoness of the Pete. Listen to this week’s episode for our complete and review. Of course, SPOILER ALERTS CONTAINED WITHIN, just for anyone that hasn’t seen it yet. In other news, the Cocaine Energy drink, a story we covered long ago, was finally defeated by the FDA and asked to be pulled from store shelves. When the Cyborg Barker 3000 finally deactivates, the Food Box Gobler 2k8 wants to take his place hosting The Price is Right. We beg humanity to not ruin a classic show in such a way. The classic line of "What would you do if you knew you were going to die?" was answered by a British man, but then the more unlikely statement of "Oh, guess we were wrong about that" was expressed by doctors. Right, get started helping the Eco Wackos by killing every 5 of 6 people you see. Just make sure that any fire arm you get is a qualifying purchase on your World of Warcraft VISA card, that way you can cash in the points toward game play. Hopefully, you all have better luck loading the Maro: Game Over Video for your viewing pleasures. If not, just grab your Nintendo DS and play some naughty video games. But remember, like Sony says, killing goats is baaaaad. Actually, they think it’s good, I just wanted to use the reference. Finally, WTF is Wrong With Japanese People shows that stupid shit happens to them on a daily basis, such as going to a simple movie and getting sick from it. So, when in Japan next, not captured for torture purposes of course, make sure to head to a local theater to watch "Babel" and laugh at all the sub people getting sick.

Movies

Spider-Man 3 Breaks Record, Makes $148 Million

Spider-Man 3 made $59m in North America on Friday

Zombies on a Plane! What will they think of next?

Stupid Shit

‘Cocaine’ Drink Pulled From Shelves Nationwide

Rosie O’Donnell to host Price is Right?

What do you MEAN I’m not going to die?

Eco-Extremist Wants World Population to Drop below 1 Billion

They’re Taking The Hobbits To Isengard

Gaming

World of Warcraft VISA

Mario: Game Over

Naughtiness on the Nintendo DS

God of War Premiere

Japanese

Japanese Babel Sickness

 

 Episode 41: Emo Penguins and Their Web of Sorrow [61:42m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5688)

World record holding The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show here to hit you square in the eye and then eat your dog before you can see it brings you yet another cool episode of wacky stuff that you can’t believe this is such a long ass sentence for us to put at the beginning of the show notes but totally feel justified in doing so as a direct result of all the mega hella awesomely cool material for all of the fantastic Transcontinental Penguin Super Show fans and listeners to behold with their fore mentioned eyes that we are about to hit them in…..*GASP FOR AIR*……We have so much material today that we are going to do the short short version…..Mother teaches son sex ed with her own body, real life samurai aids police with bad guys, Wii can kill you if you drink too much water just ask the lady from the radio contest, if you are 29 and molest children please do not pretend to be 12 and enroll in grammar school, stupid crooks and GPS units, Wal-Mart creates own power company, VISTA!!!!!!!!!!  Holy shoot!!  WORLD OF WARCRAFT: THE BURNING CRUSADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Damn, this really was an easy one today.  Oh ya, WTF is Wrong with Japanese People was here too with Japan scrapping 10 year old moon mission and of course what kids should have life sized Gundam figures to assemble around the dinner table.  Of course, maybe they could get a PS3 now that the price came down in Japan a bit….cough…cough….In case you are wondering, 2.4 million units of TBC were sold in a 24 hour period.  Have a great listen and catch ya’ll next trip

Stupid Shit 

Mother teaches sex education to her son using her own body

Real-life samurai superhero saves police

Woman Killed In Wii-Related Competition

'12-year-old' is 29-year-old sex offender

Thieves jack 14 GPS devices, forget to turn them off

Wal-Mart Creates Its Own Electricity Company, Eyes Wind Power

Microsoft Windows Vista Ultimate Limited Numbered Signature Edition.. Yes really..

Tech 

NYC 911 to add Camera phone support

Get A Mac: surgery, sabotage, and tech support

Man's cell phone ignites in pocket, causing serious burns

MySpace to offer spyware for parents

Pentium 4 631 Overclocked to 8 GHz

Gaming

Developer: The Wii-Mote Can Do More, WAY MORE

Times look at WoW

WoW Burning Crusade Sells 2.4 MILLION In 24 Hours

How you'll play Mortal Kombat on Wii

The New, New Wii Strap

Price Drops of PS3 in Japan

Japanese 

Japan scrapping their moon mission

Tons of Pictures of Life Size Gundam Model Being Assembled by Maru Family

 

 Episode 38: We Put Them Penguins on Rock Rock [59:29m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5866)

On this action packed adventure with The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show you should really remember to wear a jacket…..Kind of a shorter show for you this week so let's go.  Road rage can be a good thing sometimes, but only when you are attacking the right person.  This week's shout out goes to the drunken teenager ramming what he thought to be his girlfriend's car because she didn't give him a goodbye kiss.  FYI - it was a random stranger.  Update on the horrible parents that let the dog eat their babies toes.  It was actually the ferret!  They might actually get the child back, too.  God the system sucks.  Like Mario?  And penguins?  And dancing to Outkast?  Watch this wacky video.  In other much cooler videos, check out the new Transformers movie teaser.  Only 6 months to go!  Also, another epic returns to the silver screen soon as Indiana Jones 4 is finalized and shooting begins this year.  CES and MacWorld are here and that means tech gadgets a gogo.  Most noteable is the new iPhone from Apple.  It is a cell phone iPod hybrid which runs Mac apps, games, movies, all that jazz, but wait…..Cisco already pattened the name.  D'oh!  Way to be an ass Steve Jobs.  This week, Mike brings to you the first Transcontinental Nintendo Wii Review.  To some it all up, it was freaking awesome.  Creator of Scooby Doo dies, but more importantly, he was from Japan!!!!  WTF is Wrong With Japanese People we say goodbye to Iwao Takamoto and thanks for the doo!  Feeling down?  How about the world's largest Japanese hoedown?  YEEHAWWWW, DOMO!  This week in Hiro, Masi Oka sits down and talks all about the second half of the Hereos season.  Should be filled with lots of Hiro awesomeness including a new love interest, more with homo gay dad George Takei and the sword!!!  Also, look for episode 12 to reveal the dinosaur!  On this note, have a fun filled time and don't forget about the contest!!!  Email us whether you believe Mike's impression was that of Jimmy Stuart or Barney Fife and we will mail you …..  A PEN!!!  I gotta have more cowbell!!!!

Stupid Shit

Teenage boy doesn't get a goodnight kiss, rams his car into the wrong girl 

The Ferret Did it. 

Penguin Dance Featuring Super Mario Brothers

Movies 

Transformers Teaser 

4th Indiana Jones film has been finalized

Tech

The Apple iPhone 

Apple now sued over iPhone name - As if we didn't see this coming!

Japanese 

Scooby-Doo Creator Dies

Japanese Cowboy Hoedown

This Week in Hiro…

Second Half of Season Hiro  

 

 Episode 37: [56:42m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5912)

Welcome everyone to the very first video edition of The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show.We have been plotting this for a long time and decided it was time to do it.  This was definitely uber fun and expect to see another one at some point, locations and time pending.  So much content, so little time, but hey….there's video!  Since the normal progression of the show is disturbed, we trust that you will click all the links and check out everything.  Think of it like a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book.  Let's get to it.  For all the computer people out there, and you should be if you listen to this show, watch the total noob try to sell this PC.  FYI, he is the same guy that stabbed himself when he snapped a katana in half.  Remember that when in Russia, naked women on the side of the street = stolen car and goods.  Anyone surprised that the HD DVD encryption is already cracked?  At this point if you are bored, take a minute to make up something and file a law suit against Apple, everyone else.  Car + Windows = Future Record Breaking Car Accident.  Could China have any more phone users?  Perhaps the WarGames movie sequel will address this.  In the gaming world, check out the two already modded Wii videos, one is a Roomba control and the other Wii Bowling on a movie screen.  Marvel at the horror and people's stupidity in the Wii Injuries story.  Nintendo's world domination continues with the sale of 35 million DS units worldwide.  On the flip side, Sony is finally wanting to be white.  Sony also "claims" the PS3 kiosks freeze on purpose, but we think we all know the truth behind that garbage.  Sony, you have earned yourself a giant ROFL.  In this week's Shout Outs we give a big shout to UPS employees that diverted $19,000 in PS3 units for their own personal gain.  Lastly, the teens of America that can't drive worth of shit now have an excuse, the video game industry must be to blame……or just perhaps teens can't drive worth of shit.  Last but certainly not least, we have for you the very first WTF is Wrong With Japanese People of 2k7!!!  W00T!  Ah the Japanese and their game shows.  Watch these two bizarre showings; dough kneading and doggie bacon face stacking?????  Thanks to tight living quarters, this woman went to jail for annoying her neighbor.  One down, eleventy billion to go!  HAPPY NEW YEAR our penguin brethren!

Video Available in iPod, Windows Media, and on Google Video

Horrible Computer Sale Guy QVC

Samurai Sword screw up on QVC  

Beware Hot Naked Girls Robbing People in Moscow

Tech 

HD DVD Encryption Hacked!

Apple gets the shit sued out of them!

Ford and Microsoft Partner on Automotive OS

China has 830 million phone users, 132 million online

Movies 

WarGames Sequel Now Filming

Gaming 

WiiRoomba

Wii Bowling Super-Sized  

THE WII DEVILS

Wii Injuries (with pics and stories)

Nintendo's DS passes the 35 million mark worldwide

White PS3 is as special as you are. Maybe more special.

PlayStation 3 kiosks freezing up … on purpose!

PS3 bandits busted for $19,000 in "diverted" UPS shipments

Video games blamed for teens who suck at driving!

Japanese

Japanese Dough Kneading Gameshow

Japanese Dog Bacon Stacking Gameshow  

Woman Gets 20-Months in Prison for Loud Music

 

 Episode 36: Happy Penguin New Year [40:49m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5941)

Sometimes even a holiday as sacred as Christmas can't stop The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show.  This week we have for you honestly one of our most entertaining show to date.  Plenty of news; let's dive right in.  Oh the music, like Edward Norton and Brad Pitt singing "The Penis Song" for Fight Club, we also had a beautiful piano rendition of one of the most old school board games ever, Crossfire, toss in a few random 80s cartoon piece, i.e. M.A.S.K. and Voltron: Defender of the Universe, and we all be set.  Google wants to not only rule the world, they want the whole galaxy, too, as they join forces with NASA.  No longer is it necessary to wash your iPod before you use it or your Mac using Photoshop thanks to Apple and it's recent flood.  At least it wasn't a giant pile of human feces like the old man that trapped himself in his bathroom.  Myspace users that decide to commit crimes should not check their MySpace because they will get caught.  Big shout out to Ryan C. Shrouder for hacking his school and changing 19 people's grades.  GRATS!  World's tallest man saves dolphin by fisting it's stomach.  Thank you Maury Povich for exploiting people's fear with the new one to add, fear of peaches.  And the winner of the academy award for worst parent goes to……….OMG, it's a tie between drugged out parents that let their baby daughter's toes get chewed off by a puppy and the mother than put her baby in the microwave.  World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade Office Cinematic Trailer is officially here!  Check it out and then read up on the real Leeroy Jenkins at his E3 interview.  Notice the significant less Wii and PS3 content?  That's because all the things we have been saying for eleventy billion years have come true and we don't feel the need to brag.  Nintendo outsells Sony in November, but like President Bush, Sony believes they are winning.  It turns out Nintendo is even making a profit on just the system alone as Sony is actually losing money per system.  This, amongst other things, has helped the Wii to become the faster selling console of all time.  And by the by, the Wiimote is totally here to stay!  Allow WTF is Wrong With Japanese People to give you the Japanese Wii Saftey Manual.  Trust us when we say these pictures look like exactly what they are.  Enjoy the ending music?  Click the link Almost Opposite

Crossfire Live

Star Wars Paraody 

Kid Gets Lightsaber for Christmas, Lops Off Grandma's Torso

Edward Norton and Brad Pitt sing 'The Penis Song' for a Fight Club trailer

NASA Takes Google on Journey into Space

Apple Computer Building Floods After Water Leak…"100 Gallons per minute"

Man trapped by mountain made up of bags of his own feces, jars of…

Fugitive Caught After Checking His Myspace Page

Class President Arrested For Hacking - Changing Grades Of 19 Students

World's tallest man uses long arms to save China dolphins

Guy is Absolutely Terrified of Peaches

Puppy chews off infant girl's toes

Mom Who Microwaved Baby Arraigned

Gaming

WoW Burning Crusade Cinematic Trailer Officially Released

The real Leeroy Jenkins - Ben Schulz

Wii Outsells Sony for November…Sony resopnds.

One Wii costs Nintendo $158 to make

Wii is Fastest Selling Console - Ever!

THIS Wiimote is goin' nowhere

Japanese

The Japanese Wii Safety Manual is Crazy

 

 Episode 35: Chock full of nutty goodness...and some fruit cake [67:56m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5814)

 

 Flash Video [2:26m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (416)

Another day, another Transcontinental Penguin Super Show.  This week we learn and teach some very valuable lessons.  For example, we learned how to not rob a convenience store; it is bad to kill your grandma and carry parts of her corpse in your luggage; turkeys definitely can not fly; and when being held at gun point by robbers simply morph into a power ranger and all will be well.  With the passing of Thanksgiving, so passes one of the most busy shopping days of all year and Microsoft's hope to dethrone the iPod; Zune didn't do so hot Bill.  Sony just continues to fail at making electronics for some reason has thousands of digital cameras have a defect in them.  Please return these in the same box as your defective PS3 for easy shipping.  And what oh what can be said about said console?  We make an official public apology at this time seeing how it is unfortunately real and therefore not from unicorn land.  However, good luck finding one.  Sony is sold out, people get shot whilst waiting in line, bugged at 1 A.M. for being a retard, or are stupid stupid eBay sellers.  All in a days work for the PS3 clientele.  Nintendo of course has a new system out called the Revolution…..seriously, also good luck finding the Wii because it sold out fast, too.  Only difference from Sony, expect more Wii soon.  Our buddies at Blizzard are doing quite well as the biggest mmorpg ever prepares for it's giant expansion pack release.  In the mean time, enjoy the new Office Space World of Warcraft commercial.  FYI, it seems Peter seems to be a bigger noob than we all thought as he is playing an Alliance Female Human Mage and of course as we all know only 11 year olds play Alliance because Alliance is easier and for little girls. FOR THE HORDE!!!  Please no emails about suicide as we will be forced to send you a canned message in return.  So thirsty….need drink….need this week's WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  Save me Pepsiman save me!!!  Finally on This Week in Hiro, it seems Hiro bent time and space so much that Mr. Sulu ended up being his father.  Read all about George Takei's guest spot on the greatest show on television currently, Heroes, Mondays on NBC at 9 PM.  Stayed tuned for some awesome Mike and Chris rambling; over very inspiration for this show's creation.

Stupid Shit

How NOT to rob a convenience store…

Man found carrying grandmother's head in suitcase

"As God Is My Witness, I Thought Turkeys Could Fly"

4-year-old in Power Ranger costume saves family from gun-toting robbers

Tech 

Microsoft’s Zune Suffering Awful First Day Sales

Sony Finds Defect in Digital Cameras As Well !

Gaming 

Banned WoW player thretens Blizzard with suicide

World of Warcraft scans players' Internet Explorer browsing history

World of Warcraft Office Space Commercial

US to get 150-200k Wiis per week

Wii North American Commercial Debut

Extend your Wii warranty for free

Wii-mote & Nun-chuk Shortages

4 year olds learn gaming habits from playing Nintendo Wii

Wii VC games leaked on the Net

Nintendo trying to bring Goldeneye 007 to the Wii

Wii Sensor Bar replacement…2 candles?

Wii uses about 1/10th of the power of 360

PS3 broken straight out of the box - Video

How NOT to sell your PS3 - via craigslist… at 1am… in a parking lot…

Boston Mayor Bills Sony after PS3 Riots Require Twelve Police Cruisers

Gamestop threataning to fire employees if they buy a PS3

Taco Bell wants your Playstation 3

Ridge Racer 7 Graphical Errors On Playstation 3

88,400 PS3s Sold in Japan in 2 Days

PS3 Launch Shooting in Conn. 

PS3 for $0.99 on Ebay

Own this Playstation 3 and earn it!

Japanese 

Pepsiman Japanese Commercial 

This Week In Hiro 

George Takei (Star Trek's Sulu) To Join NBC's "Heroes"

 

 Episode 34: As God is My Witness, I Thought Penguins Could Fly [63:50m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (6210)

 After a short hiatus, The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show returns fast as ever and now with the ability to travel through time.  Yes, we are just that awesome….For those that are cave bound or simply do not have any of the information gathering senses, it is console time, bitches!  The PS3 and Nintendo Wii are right next door and we've got dirt and likes pouring out the ass to prove it.  Sony breaks into the top this week with their new PS3 TV ads.  Other links include inside views of the SIXAXIS controller and the PS3 itself taken apart, 40 gaming titles for virtual console, to crazy mofos who have been waiting in line for three weeks.  Keep in mind, this is not without it's hardships as Sony is indeed reporting Q2 losses as a result of PS3 and the laptop battery recall.  Check out these and other links such as Japanese cannibalism, um that is, people purchasing the first PS3 units.  On the flip side, Nintendo is still doing their Wiiness which has exploded into pop culture already.  Two episodes of South Park have now been about the Wii.  Other such news from Nintendo land includes more info about their virtual console, display kiosks in Japan, and information on a few new games including the new Zelda: Twilight Princess and Dragonball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 2.  More news have for you we do like the mono color of the Wii for what seems to be a while, SINGLE console codes, Number and Address Book, and others.  Also, expect a revised version next year with a DVD player.  In typical Penguin news fasion, we have our stack of wacky news such as M-80 up guy's ass, Bob Barker retiring from Price is Right VH1 Best Week Ever Top Ten Salute to things we will miss, oh yes, Spiderman 3 Fucking Trailer!!!  Even this week's WTF is Wrong With Japanese People was packed full of chocolaty goodness and nuget.  The French are bad bad people and how dare they hurt my little Japanese buddies with their rude behavior and rash environments.  Robot thinks human flesh tastes like bacon and pretty soon worse if Japan doesn't STOP MAKING ROBOTS!!!!  Asian Lady Run Over Multiple Times Video…..need we say more?  And lastly, when you give birth in an alley way or the local Target, there's now an answer other than tossing that baby in the trash; you can place it in the speed baby give up window at a local hospital near you.  Ok, so time circuits on, Flux capacitor fluxing, engine running, alright…………..

Gaming 

Microsoft Correcting 'Live' Update That 'Bricked' 360 Consoles

Sony pimps new US PS3 TV advert

First PS3 US TV Ad - WTF!!!!

PS3 Solves Rubik's Cube; Makes It Explode

PS3's SIXAXIS goes under the knife

PS3 Opened For Pictures

PS3 launch marred by further shortages

Battery recall, PS3 push Sony to Q2 loss

Nearly 40 games confirmed for PS3 online download service

PS3 Warehouse Spy Shot

There are already people in line for PS3.

PS3 buyers turn to Craigslist to find line waiters

PS3 firmware update required out-of-box

Japanese PS3 Backward Compatibility Issues Online

Japanese Playstation 3 Launch Line Video 2

Best Buy offering Xbox 360's to PS3 customers?

Wii fever hits South Park

Virtual Console: Secrets exposed

Wii Kiosks In Japan

Wii Will have SINGLE Console Codes

Wii Number and Address Book uncovered

Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 2 - Wii Game Feature

No Colors In Wii Horizon?

Nintendo Wii to feature DVD playback next year

Brand new Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess trailers!

Will Nintendo Wii Open Floodgates For Girlfriends?

Wii Won’t Rumble For N64 Virtual Console Games

Nintendo Wii Excite Truck Supports Custom Soundtracks

Nintendo Wii $250, Xbox 360 $100?!

Japanese

'Paris Syndrome' leaves tourists in shock

Robot Identifies Human Flesh as Bacon

Asian Lady Run Over Multiple Times Video

Hospital plans to set up baby hatch

Hospital plans to set up baby hatch - Possible Real Pic

The Web Is 16 Today

Is this the stupidest man alive?

Thug Tricked by David Copperfield

15-year-old Girl Starts Caucasian Club at her High School

Video: Man in 31-Wheel Roller Suit….achieves speeds of 60 MPH

The Top 10 Things We’ll Miss About Bob Barker

Police dress up as Batman and Robin to catch drugs suspect

Spiderman 3 Trailer 

 

 Episode 33: More Powerful than 1.27 Gigawatts [62:20m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5691)

Coming at ya in that funny way only we could, The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show is indeed Firefox 2.0 compliant, get yours today!  Feeling lonely or mischievous?  You should grab the new Cloak of Partial Invisibility.  We hear that is had 152 armor, 22 agility, 1% chance to hit, and 2% chance to crit.  Other weird news includes having your favorite baseball team on your coffin when you die and mannequin man just can't get enough thanks to his weird ass fetish.  Sony, Sony, Sony, what can we say?  Is it possible it's not a joke and the PS3 exists?  Well the release of the list of accessories and prices leads us to believe that.  Also, the exceptionally long list of downloadable games will destroy your mind, caution whilst reading. Sony might not meet it's shipment numbers yet again.  Thank god that I can take my PSP into the bathroom and have it stream off my PS3.  Other tid bits of information include no Gamer Scores available and Sony to replace controllers when not working.  Still don't believe us?  Look at the pics of the PS3 unboxed or read the list of 24 things about the PS3 you need to know.  In comparison, because that's what we do, the Wii and PS3 controllers go head to head.  You be the judge as to which looks better, plays better, or is most comfortable.  Meanwhile in Wii land, it is confirmed the online service is free.  Also, Target starts game sales online which means, it's coming!  Learn to poop because of this week's WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  What a freaky ass cartoon but cute little kid at the end, but damn why do that to him?  BOOBIES!!!  WATCH THE VIDEO!!!  *WARNING* NEW SEGMENT!!!   This week in Hiro we discuss the real like actor and his real life adventures.  Apparently bending time isn't all he does; he also programs computers!!!  YA-TE!!!!  or however you spell that…

Tech 

Firefox 2.0 Officially Released

Awesomeness 

Scientists Create Cloak of Partial Invisibility

Stupid Shit 

Coffins to Bear Logos of Baseball Team

Man with mannequin fetish arrested again

Gaming

PS3 accessories, Blu-ray bundle revealed

PS3 Downloadable Games List

Sony May Revise PS3 Shipment Numbers

PSP and PS3 Play Together

Sony to replace PS3 controllers

No "Gamer Scores" for PS3

PS3 Unboxed

The PlayStation 3: 24 things you need to know

New video pits Wii Remote against PS3 Sixaxis controller

Rumor: Toys R Us To Begin Wii Pre-Orders On The 29th?

Wii Online Confirmed Free

Target starts Wii game sales online

This Week In Hiro 

"Heroes" Hiro is a REAL Coding Hero!

 

 Japanese Toilet Training Cartoon: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (344)

 

 Japanese Boobkini: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (377)

 

 Episode 32: Bienvendidos de la Transcontinental Penguin Super Show [53:19m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (5860)

Be careful folks, the penguins have learned how to pinch in this episode of the Transcontinental Penguin Super Show.  Ah, random weird commercials are a nice way to kick off a show that, of course, has great news for Sony.  IGN got hold of their new controller, the SIXAXIS, and really didn't like it at all.  Rumors about the Wii continue to flurish especially on the topic of kiosks for demo purpose.  So it seems they may be monitored.  A new demo video shows that yes even the Wii can freeze; however, we here are pretty sure the loud noise is not the system but rather the locked up game stuck on a sound.  We warned you and you had your chance, but all pre-orders sold out in the very first day last week.  Fear not though, because with the awesomeness pending in the form of your Startup disc and the other Wii contents, you will all be saved.  Or, if you're feeling down, listen to the way those poor bastards in Japan say "Nintendo Wii" on the demo commercial.  Big shout out to Microsoft for introducing feature in Vista that's already existed for years called sleep/suspend mode….SHOUT OUT!  Since finding a genie in a beer bottle isn't possible, simply buy the PersonalSoundtrack computer so you can be just like Peter Griffin.  Also, very great concept and environmentally awesome to Plextor and their shot at CD/DVD data destruction.  Check out their new drive that will no doubt cause panic and mayhem in an office near you soon.  Lighting!!  It's fiery and hot!!  Especially when it hits your mini van.  You'd think the FBI would have a few more than 1% of it's force that could speak Arabic but apparently they are too busy watching Goofy and Mini Mouse porn.  Chi Chi Chip and Dale, getting felt up……  The new concepts are in and the motorbike of the future slams into us all in this WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  Mr. Hiro Nakamaru shows us and the rest of the world the typical Japanese stereotype that exists.  Now please don't take this the wrong way, it is simply a funny reference as we here at TTCPSS ADORE Heroes on NBC.  Please please go out and watch Heroes or you will make baby Jesus cry!

No Pinch

Gaming 

SIXAXIS Is Worst Next Gen Controller

Wii demo kiosks to be under supervision?

Wii Freeze Too

Wii pre-orders sell out in day one

Wii Contents

New Japanese Wii Ad Has Non-Boring Hand Action (English Translation from video:"Nintendo's Wii")

Tech 

Vista PCs will nod off to save power

PersonalSoundtrack

New Plextor drive "obliterates" data on CDs/DVDs with laser blasts..

Stupid Shit 

Video of Lightening Striking a Minivan

FBI Agents Still Lacking Arabic Skills

Disney says "non" to Mouse orgy And the Video

Japanese 

Japanese Motorbike

Hiro Nakamura

Heroes

 

 Episode 31: And They Say That A Penguin Can Save Us..... [36:45m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (6324)

 

 No Pinch: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (335)

 

 Japanese Motorbike: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (390)

Thirty episodes…..gosh it's easy when you just say it like that……and what better way to celebrate this fine milestone on the Transcontinental Penguin Super Show than to discuss our favorite topics which are none other than the PS3 and Wii releases!  I guess we could also talk about the really awesome 10th season debut of South Park featuring the best MMORPG EVER CREATED, World of Warcraft!  Sony released a response to the lack of rumble feature in the PS3 controller.  A GameStop regional manager believes that the PS3 "isn't going to launch well" which could be very accurate when hear things like neither edition will come with the cables for hookup to HD TVs.  The lack of units is still prevalent despite it going to 400,000 units now, though most of any pre-order for it is now over.  This option could actually help Nintendo and Microsoft as being a holiday other option for the lack of PS3s out there.  The Wii, on the other hand, with the CompUSA leaked pricing information, will now ship double our original estimates with 2 million units.  The pre-order for the Wii too are tight but with these plenty of units available, odds of getting one are much better even with the rumored possible early launch.  An interview with Nintendo's VP of Marketing for America answers a lot of Wii questions.  One thing plaguing our minds is the affect of sunlight on the wireless sensor some seem to be finding.  And finally despite their best efforts to hack and mod the Wii to put an OS in it, Nintendo beat you to it but having Linux already installed and what appears to be updateable.  Good job, Nintendo.  Beware of damaged fingers and names when Emerson garbage disposals sue for the new shows "Heros" slanderous scene.  Mike loses his mind for this week's WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  For the first time, there was going to be a WTF is RIGHT Story but since Yahoo News is gay and doesn't archive their own stories, there is no link.  Also, despite Chris not believing, Mike swears we have had the link of the fast Japanese undressing guy.  Watch the movie and let us know.  FInally, think America likes porn?  Well, Japan has an 80 billion dollar a year one of their own which can be seen in a new book called the "Pink Box."  That name sounds so naughty….A.D.I.D.A.S Baby!!!

Gaming 

Sony responds to lack of PS3 controller rumble again

"There is no way the PS3 launch is going to go well."

Nintendo, Microsoft May Benefit from PS3 Sell Out 

Japan: No Component Cables Included with PS3

Wii ship more than you think

Nintendo Doubles Wii Launch Units

CompUSA leaks Wii price/cost sheets

Rumor: Wii Launching Early?

Wii preorders to start by the end of the week

Best Buy: No PS3/Wii Pre-Orders

(Video)IGN interview with Nintendo's VP of Marketing answering Wii questions

Good old sunlight renders Wii's sensor bar usless?

Nintendo Responds to Wii Sunlight Issues

Wii Will Have an Updatable Linux OS

Stupid Shit 

Garbage Disposal company sues NBC for tarnishing their image

ANIMAL MAD

Japanese

Japanese Fast Undress

Japanese Sex Industry

 

 Episode 30: All Day I Dream About Penguins [37:56m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (2173)

TTPSS, apply directly to the forehead, TTPSS, apply directly to the forehead, TTPSS, apply directly to the forehead, TTPSS.  Fast shows, from us?  We really must have been on crack this week.  Alex Trebek sounded wacked out of his mind when he had to rap some of the clues on a teen Jeopardy.  Joining the Revolution, the Wii, Commodore 64 games will now also be available for download on the virtual console.  Old story regarding the Wii Channels, but hey, IT'S IN ENGLISH THIS TIME!!!  For all those anti-wireless people out there, worry not, for Nintendo will indeed have a wired ethernet kit available.  Don't expect it to be a blue light special though, as is explained the mystery glowing light on the console.  Kiosks of the new system will be exclusive to GameStop but you may be required to use your credit card to play them as theft worries owners thanks to the wireless controllers.  We suggest getting ready to wait in line as the pre-order option will not be available for GameStop.  This also applies to the PS3 and leprechauns.  Study shows gaming during the week hiners learning.  Maybe that's why we can't read or write.  In other wacky news, the energy drink Cocaine is stirring up more contraversy as a result of the name.  Also, the link shows caffeine amounts compared to other drinks which explains the tap dancing dinosaur in the corner right now.  A porn star cuts her leg after a skydiving landing though she did successfully get the shot from her new movie, "Airgazmic."  And in other stupid world records, dude puts on 155 t-shirts.  Laptop batteries aren't the only thing exploding on this adventure of WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  It seems Hello Kitty dolls are prone to explosion of warm liquid goo.  Nerds are assaulted by other Japanese guys in the electronic district for being weak and powerless.  Business men now have a new service to give them that quick freshing pick me up during their 18 hour day because that's all they do in Japan is work.  ANd of course what would this segment be without creepy robots that will no doubt kill us all in the future.  DO IT ROCKAPELLA!!!

Alex Trebek Raps

Gaming 

Commodore 64 Joins The Wii Virtual Console

First screens of Wii Channels in action

Nintendo to Sell Wii Ethernet Kit

The Wii Blue Light, Explained

Nintendo Wii kiosks to be exclusive to GameStop

No Preorders for Wii, PS3 at Gamestop

Gamestop Wii Kiosk To Require Credit Card?
Kotaku.com 

Study says no video games on school nights

Stupid Shit 

New Energy Drink "Cocaine" Stirs Up Controversy

Porn Star Cuts Leg Open While Filming Skydiving Sex Scene

World Record for Most T-Shirts Worn at One Time

Japanese 

Exploding Hello Kitty toys recalled

Nerds Assaulted in Japan 

Japanese Business Men Grooming - TO GO! 

Japanese Robot Cat 

 

 Episode 29: The Loot, The Warrant, and The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show [31:39m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (823)

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and children of all ages!!!  Welcome to the greatest show on the Internet, The Transcontinental Penguin Super Show!  I expect all old people by the end of listening to have applied for their Old Glory Robot Insurance because, face it, the metals ones are coming.  If you aren't killed by robots, perhaps you will be burned alive by the continuing laptop battery problems facing us these day's.  If not, then we will forcibly tattoo it into your forehead like "Katie's Revenge."  Poor Terri Irwin was so distraught about losing the Croc Hunter and her recent E-mail Scam Identity Exploit problem, that she decided to take revenge on all sting rays!!  Help her destroy the stinged ones by clicking the link!  Proceeds will all be spent on buying Screech, Dustin Diamond's, new sex tape.  Remember teenage girls everywhere that whilst on your myspace being whores to register to vote with the new plan.  Piraters of DVDs beware, the K9 Crew is out to get you.  Microsoft's Zune releases info on price and song quantity while the Ipod continues to dominate the market.  One of the most awesome links in the world with the interview of Peter Cullen a.k.a. Optimus Prime.  In Nintendo/Sony warfare news, Nintendo will have 1 million Wii available to Sony's 300,000 PS3.  Nintendo has also released that the Wii will have the Play History function, box art for the games released, and the Message Board System.  Also, the Opera browser will be free, but only for a short time.  If you are curious as to cost, you the calculator site and start saving now.  Lastly, just because, have a look at the inside's of the Nunchuk because you can.  Sony and it's one news story as always screws you again by turning previous series system game play into a pay for download service and gives only Japan a price break.  Seriously Sony, it's getting old…..The new Mortal Kombat Armageddon trailer is sick and the Civilization 4 spoof video is hilarious.  And yet another lawsuit take blame away from fucking parents that don't do their fucking jobs as parents and blame their warped kids minds on video games.  Good luck with that fucktards…..way to worry about money as opposed to your family……  Japanese robots teach us some awesome dance/exercise moves in our WTF is Wrong With Japanese People.  They are tiny and, of course, eat old peoples medicine for fuel…..

Old Glory Robot Insurance

Laptop in house fire is probed

Katie's Revenge

E-mail Scam Exploits Identity of Croc Hunter's Widow

Terri Irwin Revenge Game

Porn star's name may ring a 'Bell'

MySpace Launches Voter-Registration Plan

MPAA Embarassment Over Pirated DVD Sniffing Labradors

Tech